Top Comedies of All Time Pt. 4

Alright, so it's time to make this Top Comedies list of mine even. Here come #16-20!

Spaceballs (1987) - Another great Mel Brooks comedy, this late 80s hit was, as you can probably tell from the poster, a spoof on, more than anything, the uber-popular Star Wars films. It also contained little bits of everything from Star Trek to Alien, and as a whole it really worked. I was kind of overexposed to this movie as a kid. My mother, who would stay with my grandmother and I from time to time, was the kind of person that would latch onto a certain movie, and want to watch it on a regular basis. So at one point in my childhood, when I was probably around 9 or 10 years old, I had to watch this and Gene Wilder's "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory" over and over, so you can understand that I got kind of tired of them. It was the same way with the show "Cheers", she watched that all the time, and I got tired of it. But later in my life, I of course went back and realized that I loved all three.

Spaceballs features a pretty great all-star type of ensemble, with Mel Brooks as writer, director, producer, AND playing the President of Planet Spaceball, Skroob, as well as the loveable (and super Jewish) knockoff of Star Wars' mystic wiseman Yoda, known as Yogurt. It also featured Rick Moranis as the Darth Vader analogue, Dark Helmet (one of his best career roles). Bill Pullman stars in one of his earlier roles, as Han Solo type Lonestar, and John Candy turns in one of his own best roles as Lonestar's sidekick "Barf" (short for Barfolomew). Daphne Zenega is Princess Vespa of Planet Druidia, and her own sidekick/servant is the C3PO knockoff "Dot Matrix", voiced by Joan Rivers. There are many great cameos as well, such as Vespa's father King Roland, played by Dick Van Patten, Dom DeLuise as space mob boss "Pizza the Hut", Michael Winslow from the "Police Academy" series as a Spaceball radar tech, and even John Hurt (SPOILERS) as his character Kane from "Aliens".

The film really shines from beginning to end, one of Brooks' strongest efforts (and that's saying something).

Murder by Death (1976) - One of two Robert Moore directed films from the late 70s starring Peter Falk (the other being 1978's "The Cheap Detective"). Murder by Death is also a spoof film, of a sort, this one being a send-up to classic murder mystery novels and films. It features an ensemble cast, who each portray caricatures of famous detective or crime solving fictional icons. Peter Falk plays a hard boiled (meaning a bit of a jerk) San Francisco detective named Sam Diamond, a send-up to various such "Private I" type characters, most especially Sam Spade from the "The Maltese Falcon". Peter Sellers played "Chinese" detective Sidney Wang, a send-up of the infamous Charlie Chan character, who has an adopted Japanese son "Willie" that he is constantly berating, and he spouts out hilarious "fortune cookie" witticisms throughout the film. David Niven and Maggie Smith portray Dick and Dora Charleston, based on Nick and Nora Charles from "The Thin Man" film series. James Coco plays Milo Perrier, a spoof on Agatha Christie's Hercule Poirot character, and James Cromwell plays his chauffeur. Last but not least, Elsa Lancaster (of Bride of Frankenstein fame) plays Jessica Marbles, based on another of Agatha Christie's characters "Miss Marple", with Ellie Windwood playing her senile, elderly "nurse".

The movie also features a humorous turn for Alec Guinness (Obi Wan from Star Wars) as the blind butler Jamesir Bensonmum, and a rare acting role for author Truman Capote, as the eccentric millionaire Lionel Twain, who invited them all to his home for the weekend. The story itself has a very strong "Old Dark House" vibe, as Twain has invited these famous detectives to one place to see if they can solve a murder. Twain claims that it is actually he who is the world's greatest detective, and to prove it he challenges them to solve a murder, the one who does wins $1 million dollars. Hilarity ensues, of course, with all sorts of great wordplay, and such great character actors assembled. This is a highly underrated and I fear largely unknown film, that deserves to be seen by more people. It is a genuine classic, and honestly one of the funniest films you'll ever see.

 

The Addams Family (1991) -  This film represents, much like Ghostbusters, one of those murky areas where it IS most definitely a comedy, but it also has elements from other genres that are strong enough to make it a bit foggy what you should call it. But at the end of the day, I suppose this one is outright silly enough that you can't really get away with calling it anything but a comedy. Based on the classic 60's TV show, as well as the original New Yorker cartoon, this movie also represents a rarity, I find at least, in the form of an adaptation of an old show that actually works and succeeds as a film. It is not exactly like it's source material, and very much has it's own flavor, yet it does also retain the spirit and essence of the old show. Few actors could probably ever match John Astin's portrayal of Gomez Addams, the family patriarch, and that makes sense, because creator Charles Addams allowed Astin to flesh out the character on his own. But if anyone could do it, it would be Raul Julia, who does an amazing job here. Anjelica Huston does an equally fine job as Morticia Addams, as does Christopher Lloyd in one of his best roles as Fester Addams. Christina Ricci plays Wednesday Addams, and Dan Hedaya plays Tully Alford, the Addams' shady family accountant. 

The film itself is truly fantastic. Director Barry Sonnenfield did an amazing job, as this might be his best film, and composer Marc Shaiman put together a very fitting score. There is plenty of singing, dancing, laughing, and Addams-ing to be had, and if you haven't seen this film, you may very well have been living under some sort of rock. I loved it as a kid, and still do. The sequel, "Addams Family Values" isn't quite as good, but the first film is a masterpiece.

Beverly Hills Ninja (1997) - I honestly love all four of Chris Farley's starring-role movies. And as I mentioned in a previous entry, as a young teenager, my best friends and I bonded, in part, over Adam Sandler, Jim Carrey and Chris Farley comedies. But to me, this one takes the cake. His two pairings with David Spade were classic, and even his last film before his death, "Almost Heroes", was a genuinely funny film. But for my money, this was his best, simply because it's so ridiculous. Plus it marries two of my favorite kinds of film: slapstick comedies and martial arts action films. Robin Shou of "Mortal Kombat" fame co-stars as his "brother" and actual ninja Gobei, and Chris Rock also features as Joey Washington, a hotel bell-boy who looks up to Farley's "Great White Ninja" character. The movie is a riot, really, as Farley bumbles his way around Los Angeles trying to "ninja" and solve a case for a beautiful woman who "hired" him in Japan, and the film really gets the balance between comedy and action just right. It's worth noting that Robin Shou is great in this, he not only displays his trademark awesome martial arts skills, but also shows that he has depth and range as an actor, as well as good comedic timing. It's really a shame that he didn't become a bigger star here in the states, as I honestly felt at one point that he was going to be the next Jackie Chan type star. All in all, this movie is arguably Farley's strongest work, and it's just a hell of a lot of fun besides.

Dumb and Dumber (1994) - If there was ever a movie that walked the line perfectly between genuinely endearing and "feel-good", as well as flat-out silly as fuck, this would be it. Hands down my favorite Farrelly Brothers film, and also probably my second-favorite Jim Carrey comedy, this film just has so much going for it, that it's hard not to like. And trust me, I've met people who just don't like it. But that's probably because they're dead inside and wouldn't know funny if it punched them in the nose. Jim Carrey and Jeff Daniels star as Lloyd Christmas and Harry Dunne, two of the nicest, but also incredibly dumbest guys on the planet. Lloyd meets a gorgeous woman (Lauren Holly), who forgets her briefcase at the airport. So Lloyd and Harry both having lost their jobs the same day, and with nothing better to do, decide to take what little they have left, and go travel to Aspen, Colorado to find this Mary Swanson chick, so that Lloyd can return her case and hopefully win her love. Little does he know, of course, that the case holds a shitload of ransom money, and of course when the two idiots (SPOILERS) accidentally open the case and discover the money, they go about spending it all, thinking they can just "IOU" it later. This movie is full of so many memorably ridiculous scenes and quotable lines, and is another movie that if you haven't seen it, you must've been in a coma.

Without a doubt one of the funniest movies ever made, and now apparently getting a real sequel, bringing the same directors and stars (at least Carrey and Daniels) back together...all I can say is hopefully it's good.




So that fills out my personal Top 20 Comedies of All-Time. I'm gonna give the series a break, for now, but just to entice my readers, I'll go ahead and tell you that this all comes from a list I compiled recently that currently goes up to 40. So future entries will most likely happen, further down the line. As for what's next? Well who knows? But one thing is for certain.....Halloween season is right around the corner, and you can bet your boots (or whatever footwear you prefer) that you're in store for some amazing Halloween-inspired madness up ahead. Cheers!

Top Comedies of All Time Pt. 3

Round 3, ready for liftoff. Here's #'s 11-15!

Happy Gilmore (1996) - Having explained in the past my being raised by a frugal grandmother who didn't see the value in taking me to see movies in the theater, I didn't get to start really going to theaters until around 1995. That being said, "Happy Gilmore", Adam Sandler's second major picture, was one of my first theatrical comedies, along with "Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls". Some people don't like Sandler's brand of comedy (or by extension, Rob Schneider's, Chris Farley's, Norm McDonald's, etc.), because it's "sophomoric" and "immature". But really, there are many different brands of comedy, and the 90s really saw a rise in this sillier, "in your face" style of comedy, that included most of Jim Carrey's early hits. I enjoy Mel Brooks style satire, or Leslie Nielsen style word-play humor, or Monty Python style silliness as much as the next person. But I think just as there is room for Three Stooges style slapstick, so too is there room for the "grown men acting like total silly asses" style that people like Sandler made popular.

To be honest I like a great deal of Sandler's output, and I would probably even say that there are later movies of his that in many ways are better than this. But "Happy Gilmore" will always hold a special place in my heart, as it was one of the first comedies I got to see in theaters, as well as Adam Sandler and Chris Farley movies being something that my friend Brandon and I really bonded over in those early teen years. Plus, the story of a shitty hockey player going on to excel in golf, and all the rampant silliness that this movie offers, is just too good. It's a classic as much as any of the others I've listed are, and thus it deserves this spot on the list.

Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein (1948) - I'm sad to say that Abbott and Costello were not something that I was exposed to as a kid, nor the Marx Brothers, the Three Stooges, etc. I suppose my grandmother didn't appreciate/approve of their brand of humor, or something, and if she wasn't into it, especially in my early years, I didn't get to see it more often than not. I must admit that I actually didn't get into A&C until well into my adulthood (IE within the last few years). But I'm glad I finally did, because it's great. To be honest, I think I tried watching this film several years ago, and for whatever reason, at the time, I just didn't appreciate it. But upon watching it again a few years back, I guess I finally "got it".

This was one of the later in a long line of films that this classic comedy team made, in fact it was such a success that they would go on to do their own sub-series of "horror comedy" films involving Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde, an Invisible Man, a mummy, etc. And of course the film buff in me feels compelled to point out that obviously the title of the film is referring to them meeting Frankenstein's creation, "The Monster", and not the doctor himself. But this film is a classic in the truest sense of the word. It features Bela Lugosi in his only other film appearance (officially) as "Count Dracula", Lon Chaney Jr. featured for the fifth and final time as his infamous "Wolf Man", and Glenn Strange's third and final appearance as "Frankenstein's Monster". Vincent Price even makes a cameo appearance (SPOILERS) near the end of the film, as the Invisible Man. The one thing this movie was missing, really, was some kind of appearance by Boris Karloff, but he wasn't available or just not interested at the time (though he would later do two films with A&C). This film truly deserves it's own full article to really explain all the things that make it so great, but it is pure gold, from start to finish.

Wayne's World (1992) - Another of those aforementioned 90s comedies, and another vehicle for one of Sandler's fellow Saturday Night Live alumni, Wayne's World is really the movie that made Mike Meyers a star. What began as a beloved skit on SNL for several years, "Wayne's World" was a public access show broadcast from Aurora, Illinois, from the basement of host Wayne Campbell's parents' house. Along with his ever-present (and ever-awkward) best friend and co-host Garth Algar, Wayne would wax not-so-philosophical about all manner of pop-media subjects, including he and Garth's love of rock and metal music. Well, this turned out to be a winning success at the box office, as director Penelope Spheeris managed to transform those skits into a living, breathing world, and it became a huge hit, spawning a 1993 sequel that was just as good. Featuring the gorgeous Tia Carrere as Wayne's dream girl, rocker Cassandra, and bad guy music producer who's trying to horn in on said girl, Benjamin Kane (played by Rob Lowe), as well as awesome appearances by the likes of Brian Doyle-Murray, Kurt Fuller, Chris Farley, Alice Cooper, Robert Patrick and Ed O'Neill. This movie is pretty much perfect from beginning to end, the cast is fantastic, the Bohemian Rhapsody scene in the "Garthmobile" is amazing. Everything just works, which is the sign of a great film. In some ways I like the sequel even better (it DOES feature Christopher Walken as the villain), but all around, kind of like Ghostbusters, the first just wins in the classic nostalgia battle.

The Cable Guy (1996) - To be honest, much like Adam Sandler, I'm a huge Jim Carrey fan, and I really love all of his big early-to-mid-90s hits. In fact Ace Ventura 2 was one of the very first movies I got to see in theaters, so that one alone certainly holds a special place for me, and I was sorely tempted to include it this high on the list instead. But when it comes down to it, while I love Ace Ventura, The Mask, Dumb & Dumber, etc., The Cable Guy just takes the cake for me. "The Truman Show" would also be a good candidate, but in some ways I don't even consider that a comedy, so it doesn't count. Ben Stiller directed this masterpiece, starring Carrey as a nutcase "cable guy" who latches onto poor milksop Steven Kovacs (played by Matthew Broderick). The film also features early appearances in the careers of guys like Jack Black and Owen Wilson. It's a lot like Wayne's World to me, in the sense that it does just about everything right, and is great from beginning to end. It's the kind of story where Carrey's character "Chip Douglas" is totally a nutbag, and you get that, yet somehow you wind up rooting for him a bit, even as he gets continually creepier in trying to insinuate himself into new "friend" Steven's life. Ben Stiller has directed some great films, such as "Zoolander" and "Tropic Thunder", but I there's a strong argument to be made that this is his best work.

Silver Streak (1976) - Another Gene Wilder film, I did of course mention before that he's one of my all-time favorites. I also mentioned that I loved his work pairing with Richard Pryor, and while I love the other three films they did together (Stir Crazy, See No Evil, Hear No Evil, and Another You), I decided to add this one because it's not only the most well known, but probably also the most balanced of the bunch. It's a play on the Hitchcock mystery/thriller type of story, but the pairing of Wilder and Pryor just takes it over the top, as would be expected. Most of the film takes place on the eponymous "Silver Streak" train that is crossing the country, though Wilder hilariously meets up with Pryor one of the times that he gets thrown off by Richard Kiel (Jaws from James Bond). Wilder and Pryor's pairings were just magic, and to me all four films they did together were great simply because of the level of chemistry and comedic timing they had together. They were close friends in real life, and it really shows up in their on-screen performances together. I would highly recommend watching all four of their films together, but if you only catch one, make it "Silver Streak".

P.S. I just now noticed that this might be the worst case of "movie poster spoilers" ever. 



And that wraps it up for another installment. It's rapidly approach the time when I'll start doing Halloween inspired pieces once again, but I just might manage to fit in at least one more installment of this series beforehand. Cheers!

Top Comedies of All Time Pt. 2

Back for Round 2 of my personal Top Comedy Films list. And away we go!

 Planes, Trains and Automobiles (1987) - Directed by the quintessential "80s" director John Hughes, and starring the comedy tandem of Steve Martin and John Candy, there was pretty much no way that this film was ever going to be anything less than great. And it most certainly is. The pairing of Martin and Candy is so good in fact, that I would dare say they should have done more films together. They had a real chemistry here, on the same kind of level that Gene Wilder and Richard Pryor had. And naturally John Hughes' writing really plays into both actor's strengths. A story about two traveling businessmen who get stuck together by Fate during the Thanksgiving week rush, it's the classic "Odd Couple" case of two opposite personalities who must learn to coincide. Comedy gold, along with some real dramatic acting chops (something Hughes was famous for), with a great, very 80's soundtrack to boot. This film is one of both Steve Martin and John Candy's best, and that's saying something. It is highly recommended that anyone who enjoys life should see this film. And even if you don't, see it anyway, it just might cheer you up.

The Great Outdoors (1988) - Another John Hughes classic, this one written and produced by Hughes and directed by Howard Deutch. It is also another John Candy classic, and another classic "Odd Couple" style pairing, this time with Candy and Dan Aykroyd. The pair play brother-in-laws, one of whom is taking his family for a nice quiet vacation on the lake, the other who shows up out of nowhere and invites himself and his family to stay the week with them. Dan Aykroyd is great as the unlikable, blowhard, "jet setting" businessman type. John Candy, of course, is John Candy, and again Hughes' writing shines with the actors. Probably the best camping/outdoors related film I can think of this side of "Earnest Goes to Camp", and again one of the best films either star ever did. Very highly recommended.

Monty Python and the Holy Grail (1975) - Like all of the films I'm listing, really, this movie deserves it's own article at some later date, because there is just so much to talk about when it comes to the reasons why this is a great and genuinely classic comedy film. I've seen the other Monty Python films, "The Life of Brian" and "The Meaning of Life", but for my money, this is the best and funniest one. The only one I would consider a favorite of mine to be sure. The entire cast (Eric Idle, John Cleese, Graham Chapman, Michael Palin, Terry Jones and Terry Gilliam) is on fire and at their peak in this picture, the writing, acting, timing, and even low budget production are all at their absolute finest. There really isn't a bad thing to point out about the entire thing, and it's absolutely fucking hilarious besides. Some people don't "get" the British brand of humor, but I think Monty Python was it's own special brand of silliness that can translate easily to just about anybody. I'm sure there's some grumpy curmudgeons out there who wouldn't find it funny, but hey, some people have serious issues that just can't be helped. If you haven't seen this movie, do so, you owe it to yourself as a "Bucket List" type of ordeal. The musical Camelot scene alone is worth the price of admission.

Christmas Vacation (1989) - The third (and to this guy best) of the four National Lampoon's Vacation films that Chevy Chase did, this just so happens to be yet another film John Hughes wrote and produced. People remember him for his "80s teen films" he did, but those were really few and far between when you consider how many great, classic comedy films he was involved in as well (he even wrote and produced Home Alone for shit's sake). I'm also a fan of Chevy Chase, and this was him still in his prime. I would say it's arguably his best movie. John Hughes wrote the first three Vacation films, and while the first is a classic, again I'd have to say, at least to me personally, that this was one the strongest overall. It has a great ensemble cast that includes the likes of Brian Doyle-Murray, Randy Quaid, Juliette Lewis, John Randolf, Doris Roberts, and Julia Louis-Dreyfus, along with of course Beverly DeAngelo and Chevy Chase as Ellen and Clark W. Griswold. 

I would also go so far as to say that, along with Home Alone, this is the best Christmas season movie for me. The original 1947 "Miracle on 34th Street", and "It's a Wonderful Life" are strong candidates as well, and everyone seems to love "A Christmas Story" (even though it's played on tv nonstop every year). Then there's also the great Rankin/Bass holiday specials, especially "Rudolf the Rednosed Reindeer". Those are all great. But for my money, "Home Alone" and "Christmas Vacation" need to be watched every Christmas season, without a doubt.

The Burbs (1989) - Another fine 1989 piece of film greatness, "The Burbs" was directed by Joe Dante, who much like in his earlier film "Gremlins", shows a masterful ability to blend comedy and horror elements seamlessly together. This is another film, similar to "Haunted Honeymoon", that blends a strong sprinkling of comedy with a genuinely good mystery/suspense story, as Tom Hanks, your regular average suburban Joe, who gets caught up by his neighbors investigating the new, mysterious additions to the neighborhood. Another great ensemble cast is featured, including Carrie Fisher, Bruce Dern, Corey Feldman, Brother Theodore, Henry Gibson, and Rick Ducommun. I would have to say that while I enjoy many of his films (especially several of his 80s output), this is my all-time favorite Tom Hanks film. And without spoiling anything, the scene with Bruce Dern on his roof always gets me, every time, to this day.



So there's another batch, rounding out my personal Top Ten Comedies of All Time. It may be a coincidence that a majority of my Top Ten are 80s films, but it really can't be helped, as the 80s were a great time, really, for movies of all genres, but most especially comedies. I'll return again soon to further flesh out of the list, but I think these ten already provide a pretty great look into my personal tastes. And into some truly great, and funny movies. If you haven't seen them yet, go do so. If you have already seem them, go see them again because they're worth it. Cheers!

Top Comedies of All Time Pt. 1

Well, I've been meaning to do this for quite some time, so I figured I might as well jump into it. It's an arduous task, to say the least, trying to compile a list of my personal top all-time films, starting with comedies. I say arduous because other than the top one or two, it gets a bit rough really trying to place them, let alone the stickiness of "well it IS a comedy, but it also isn't", which many of my favorites fall into. Some that fall into this pit of doom, are movies like The Princess Bride, Big Trouble in Little China, Home Alone, Beetle-juice, The Addams Family, etc., which are all certainly comedies, but they also have elements of one or more other genres, sometimes heavily so. So it gets a bit rough trying to say "Well should I count this as one of my top comedies, or a top something else?"

But that conundrum aside, I'm going to start making the attempt anyway. It should be noted that naturally, I will be covering pretty much all of these films on their own, in far greater depth, at some point down the road. It should also be noted (though it kind of goes without saying) that these are my own personal top comedy picks, and not any sort of attempt at some kind of "Official List". So here goes nothing.

Young Frankenstein (1974) - This Mel Brooks classic tops not only my list of favorite all-time comedies, but favorite movies of all time as well. Over the years of my life, my "favorite movie ever" has changed many times. But now that I'm into my early 30s, and am getting pretty well set into my adult ways, Young Frankenstein just absolutely tops the list. There is really nothing NOT to like about this film. It has everything: it's a great send-up to the classic Hollywood horror films of the 30s and 40s, it's a hilarous, and terribly clever comedy, it's got an amazing cast, great cinematography, perfect pacing, you name it. It was co-written by Gene Wilder and Mel Brooks (one of the few Brooks films he doesn't also at least appear in on-screen), and the genius of both men really shines. I honestly wish that Brooks and Wilder had done more than three films together, because their work (The Producers, Blazing Saddles, Young Frankenstein) is just solid gold. They both did great things separately, but I don't think it's too hard an argument to make, to claim that their best works were together.

But at the end of the day, there is a very select number of films that are at the top of my favorites list, that I can literally pretty much just put on and watch any time. Most of my favorite films, even if I really love them, I have to be in the mood to want to watch them. But there those precious few, that I can be totally content watching almost any old time. And Young Frankenstein, again, tops that list.

 

Ghostbusters (1984) - What do you get when you combine the creative genius of guys like Ivan Reitman, Dan Aykroyd and Harold Ramis, with the onscreen chops and chemistry of people like Aykroyd, Ramis, Rick Morranis,  Ernie Hudson, Sigourney Weaver and Bill Murray? One of the single greatest films ever crafted, is what. A film that, when in production, I'm sure very few people ever suspected would blow up to become the massive, decade defining mega-hit that it was, but that's exactly what Ghostbusters did. Similarly to Young Frankenstein, I have only slight qualms about including it on a "Top Comedy Film" list, simply because it has such strong elements of other genres, namely horror and science fiction. Ghostbusters blends it's elements so well, the sci-fi and paranormal pastiche, the at-times-genuinely-creepy horror moments, the clever and subtle humor infused throughout. The casting was perfect, the writing spot on, the cinematics again excellent, a great (though very 80s) soundtrack, the story was interesting and compelling, and the film even had great stop-motion and practical special effects work that still stands up today. 

Ghostbusters became so popular, that it pretty much made the careers of Aykroyd and Murray, both of whom were already rising stars, it solidified the directing careers of Ramis and Reitman, it helped further propel the likes of Weaver and Morranis to their own stardom, and that was just the people involved. The theme song by Ray Parker Jr. is still popular to this day, and was a massive hit in the 80s. The movie spawned toys, comics, video games, a 1989 sequel, and one of the greatest cartoon shows of all time, "The Real Ghostbusters". This is another film atop that list of movies I can watch at any time.

Throw Momma From the Train (1987) - In what would be a breakthrough "leading man" role, as well as first major directorial success for Danny DeVito, his pairing with Billy Crystal for this film was pure magic from start to finish. Where the first two films on this list take elements from/are sendups to classic science fiction and horror films, this is equally a comedy as well as a love letter to classic noir and Alfred Hitchcock style mystery/suspense films. Character actress Anne Ramsey had a great turn as DeVito's senile, overbearing mother. As a writer, this film also holds some special resonance with me, on being a writer and the struggle of keeping yourself writing, not to mention finishing a work. But beyond that, it's just a great, truly classic comedy in every sense of the word.

Haunted Honeymoon (1986) - Two of Gene Wilder's directorial efforts that I really love (the other being 1977's "The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes' Smarter Brother"), this film upon theatrical release was a financial failure, as it's stay at the box office was terribly short. Which, in this man's estimation at least, is a real crime of Hollywood, considering the fact that it is, in many ways, a truly brilliant and genuinely funny film. Wilder wrote, directed and starred in this film, co-starring alongside his then wife in her final film before her death to ovarian cancer in 1989, Gilda Radner. And they really are fantastic together on-screen. The film features a great supporting cast of character actors such as Jonathan Pryce, Paul L. Smith and of course Dom DeLuise in a great cross-dressing role as the eccentric "Aunt Kate". This film is yet again a bit of a genre-bender, a send-up to both classic radio dramas as well as classic Hollywood horror and mystery films.

Of the "Top Five" that I'm covering in this entry, this is by far the most under-viewed and underrated. A largely unappreciated film upon it's original release, it is one of those that found it's audience later through cable and home video, which is where I first discovered it as a kid. It's a great film, and also no coincidence whatsoever that Gene Wilder features so prominently in my favorite comedy films, as he was to me, without question, one of the few true geniuses of the art.

Groundhog Day (1993) - A Harold Ramis film starring Chris Elliot, Andie MacDowell, and Bill Murray, this is (spoilers) probably the most recent comedy film in my "Top Ten". It is also the only one of these "Top Five" that is not really a send-up to another genre, though it's fairly original premise does carry light science fiction within it: the idea that a man could get stuck living out the same day, over and over, for a very long time, perhaps even forever. The genius of this film, is both in the concept, and the way Murray is able to portray a character's evolution and growth within a never-ending existential crisis, how he copes with it, and how he eventually comes out the other side. This movie is not as rife with completely "laugh out loud" moments as it's fellow top candidates, but what it does share with them, is that it too is basically a movie I can sit and watch whenever. Not AS strongly as the others, there is a slight "in the mood" threshhold for Groundhog Day, but it's still right there, toeing that line.



So that's it for now. I'll be back with continuing increments in the future, but for now, enjoy, and if you haven't seen any of these films I've mentioned, please do yourself a favor and make sure that you do see them, as soon as possible. They're that good.

Childhood Memories: Earliest Gaming Experiences

My earliest video game memory of all time, of course, is probably Pac-Man. Either Pac-Man or Dig Dug. Either way, it was the early 80s, me having been born in late 1981, and games like Pac-Man and Dig Dug were still all the rage, at a time when video arcades were probably at their peak. One of my favorite pass-times in my early childhood, was sitting at a table-top machine of Pac-Man or Dig Dug (because they were easier for me to see and get to), and pretend that I was playing. At a very young age, naturally, I wasn't fully cognizant of the fact that the demo mode gameplay the machine would display, wasn't me actually playing. I eventually figured it out of course, but that still didn't stop me from pretending. I did, of course, get to actually get a quarter and play one of these classics, every once in awhile, but par for the course (and my age), I really didn't understand how to play them that well, and thus never made it that far. We're talking like 3 or 4 years old here, so it's understandable. But I still loved it. I was not yet obsessed with video games as I would become when I first got my NES many years later. But it's fair to say, whether it was Pac-Man or Dig Dug that I actually saw first, that I was fascinated from the get-go. You might even say it was love at first sight.

Ladies and gentlemen, THE bleeding edge of early 80s technology!

Now arcades would continue to be a love affair of my childhood, all the way up into my teens. Part of it, growing up, was the mystique of it all, because my grandmother didn't really like me playing them, so she would rarely ever "waste money" by giving me quarters. So I usually just got to watch others play, and the rare times when I would manage to get my very own shiny quarter, whatever game I played, because I rarely ever GOT to play, that quarter would burn up faster than Mario in hot lava. So my little tastes of early arcade gaming were terribly fleeting, and that made me love it and want it all the more.

However, if you'll observe the picture above, you'll see the face of my first truly extended experience with "gaming". Around the age of 3 or 4 I would say, my grandmother bought a Radio Shack model of one of these early Tandy computer contraptions you see in the picture. These things were one of the first readily available home computers, and thus were very popular, long before IBM and Windows compatible computers took over the market. My grandmother, as adults tend to do, bought it to use as a word processor and to to her finances on. But she also did use it to try and invest in my early education, by bringing home several educational "games" for me to play. I enjoyed these, as much as they can be enjoyed I suppose. The one I remember most was some version of "Hangman", a spelling game, where you have to guess the letters in a word, and if you get too many guesses wrong, it finishes building a gallows complete with a poor little blocky dude hanging. There were other games, very basic math based games, and I do believe some kind of odd "image matcher" type of game, involving extremely blocky representations of playing cards or something like that.

The true oddity, if you really study the pic for a second, is that this picture specifically shows the obscure and really oddball "disc drive" our computer had. It's a cassette tape deck, and somehow they had really simple programs on these tapes that you pop in, and the computer reads it. Tandy computers also had floppy disc drives, but I don't think ours did. I mainly just remember the tape deck thing, because it was something no other device I ever had since possessed.

"Now you're playing with power...........oh wait".

But really, my first TRUE home video gaming experience must've come around '86 or so, when I was 4 or 5, when one of my aunt's gave us a hand-me-down Atari 2600, because their family had gotten one of the newer Atari systems. I do seem to remember us having the paddle style controllers pictured above, with the dial and the button on the side. We probably also had the regular stick controllers, but the dial ones stand out more. The only games I remember us having, were Combat, Space Invaders, and this game called Astroblast. Combat was fine, and it was two-player, so my grandmother played it with me a handful of times, though she wasn't really into games that weren't specifically puzzle or card type games. For anyone who doesn't know, Combat pretty much was the pack-in with Atari 2600, as everyone had a copy. It's a multi-games-in-one cart type of deal, with various tank and plane one on one battle games, hence the title "Combat". Space Invaders speaks for itself, but while the artwork for the game looked cool and made me want to play it the most, I rarely ever did try to play it, because it was fucking hard, especially for my 4/5 year old self.

Classic video gaming at it's finest.

The first game that I suppose you could call my "favorite game", outside of pretending to play things like Pac-Man and Dig Dug when we would go out for pizza or something, was the third game, "Astroblast". Now, for most of my life, for whatever reason, I used to think that this game was called "Asteroid", as in the same title as the famous "AstroidS", minus the "s". I'm not sure why I thought it was called this, maybe it was simple childhood logic, because you shoot asteroids, or I suppose it's possible that maybe the game was mislabeled. Regardless, I used to search for pictures or footage of this game online, and could never find it, until I did some deeper sleuth-work, and discovered it was actually called "Astroblast". In this game, as you can see, play a little tank or whatever, and you have to shoot at a non-stop barrage of falling asteroids. Like many 2600 era games, it was more of an endurance type of game, where you lasted as long as you could, to get the highest score you could. In a nutshell, classic gaming in it's purest form. Every once in awhile, a UFO would wander across the top of the screen, and if you were lucky enough to hit it, you got bonus points. Naturally, the longer you lasted, the faster the asteroids started coming down, and thus the harder it got.

I don't really remember anymore how far I ever got, or what my highest score ever was. I was a bit too young to really remember those types of details. But I will say that this was the first game that I actually got to play extensively, that I got addicted to, as I pretty much only played this on our Atari. It's good, solid pre-8-bit gaming, and a fond memory from my early years. Now I know there was a definite gap where we no longer had the 2600, before I finally got an NES. We had the 2600 when I was in preschool, and we moved to a different town for a bit when I was in kindergarten, and by that point already, my grandmother had gotten rid of it for some reason, or we just never unpacked it. I'm not really sure, though I do know we definitely didn't still have it years later when I finally got an NES around 3rd grade or so. But either way, my childhood gaming took a bit of a nap, except for when I would come across an arcade machine somewhere, for a few solid years before Nintendo took over my young world.

So there you have it, some of my earliest gaming memories. It's safe to say that video games have been a part of my life, in one way or another, for most of my existence. And quite frankly, with the exception of some (totally justified) cases of gamer rage at some game or another being a real asshole to me, gaming has always been a source of escape, relaxation, and happiness in my life. So here's to you, video games. Cheers!

Forgotten Gems: Godzilla 2, War of the Monsters

 

Building off of last week, there was actually an NES sequel Toho produced to their Godzilla game. This time, it was a significantly different genre of game. Where as the first game was basically, at it's heart, a side-scrolling action title, Godzilla 2 on NES took a vastly different route, experimenting with the (at the time) fairly new "tile based strategy game" genre.  As a kid, naturally, I rented it because it was there, and it was Godzilla. I would have rented it if it was called "Godzilla Teaches Spelling". That actually might have been pretty awesome, now that I think about it. Also, the cover really lures you in.

I mean just look at that bad boy!

The cover definitely promises something amazing. Giant Godzilla, towering above skyscrapers (which is unrealistic, because he's not THAT big, only 40-50 odd stories tall in most films), surrounded by lighting and an ominous red hue. Funny story, that artwork is actually the Japanese promotional art for the 1984 movie "Return of Godzilla", the first film in the so-called "Hesei Era", the first Godzilla film in roughly a decade, after the last "Showa Era" film, "Terror of Mechagodzilla". For the uninitiated, Japan tends to refer to "eras" of the nation's history by the title of their Emperors, and "Showa" was the title of Emperor Hirohito. A little cultural history for ya! But yes, that was the super-awesome (and somewhat misleading) promo art for the first of a whole new line of Godzilla films, whereas the promo "art" we got in America for our version, "Godzilla 1985", was just an image of Godzilla's face straight out of the film. They obviously decided to use the Japanese art for this game, and considering I never got to see most of the "Hesei Era" Godzilla films until I was in my late teens (they weren't really available until then), I of course had no way of recognizing it, even though I had seen "Godzilla 1985", which isn't all that great as G-films go. But I digress.

Just look at that action.

Back to the actual game, what you see above is pretty much the game in a nutshell. You have 12 scenarios to choose from, each a different map with different monsters and varying goals. The overall goal in each scenario, is that in this game instead of playing as the monsters, you play as the Earth's military defenses, which include fighter and bomber planes, tanks, missile launchers, electric maser cannons, and even the Super-X ship from "Return of Godzilla" (and 1989's "Godzilla vs. Biolante").  You do get to play as one monster though, Mothra. She starts out certain scenarios as an enemy monster, but if you find and protect her egg, you will then gain control of her as a friendly unit to fight other monsters with. As a kid, naturally, I was disappointed to be fighting against my hero, "The Big G". But I still played the hell out of it, and I may have even rented this game more than once (I really can't recall now).

"You couldn't hit the broad side of a Godzilla!"

As you can see, the way the game plays out, is that you move units around the map, and when you run into monsters, or they approach you, you can initiate a battle sequence, wherein you choose from whatever attacks your particular unit has at it's disposal, and then as seen above, you play some weird "slot machine" type game, where you have to match up different icons, that do different things like raise your defense or attack, accuracy, etc., and literally depending on what you get in that, is the basis for how that battle tends to go. If you don't defeat a monster relatively quickly, and they move away from you, they will recover health, while naturally you don't. To do that, you have to move your units back to their particular bases for repairs, which you can do as many times as you need. However, once you exhaust all available units, it's game over, as there is no real "resource management" in this game, just the units you start with, and a limited number of reserve units you can call into action from the bases. Like I said, it's a very basic, bare-bones tile based strategy game, but it's not really bad at all. It's fun for what it is, and it helps if you're a Godzilla nut like I am. The tunes in this game aren't nearly as awesome or memorable as Godzilla: Monster of Monsters, but they're decent, if not a bit repetitious after awhile.

The one real flaw I'll levy at this game, is that it doesn't have a real ending. I know, I've played and beaten all 12 scenario missions. You get the same little "Congratulations" screen for beating each one, but there is nothing for beating them all. Too bad really, but it's still kind of neat for what it is. So if you're into Godzilla, or are curious about an early tile based, turn based strategy title, I'd suggest giving it a spin.

Forgotten Gems: Godzilla, Monster of Monsters

 

If you've been following my blog, you might have figured out by now, via my site logo, and various graphics employed on the Twitter and Tumblr pages, etc., that I'm a pretty big Godzilla fan. In fact I pretty much decided from the moment that I began Retro Revelations, that Godzilla was going to be the unofficial mascot. When I created the logo banner graphic, I did so with several thoughts in mind. The foremost among them, was that having a depiction from a video game would help convey my love for video games, Godzilla, and film in general, as well as helping to convey what this blog site is all about: All things Retro and Classic. Plus I felt that utilizing that particular pic, which is actually from the ending of the game I'm about to talk about, was especially poignant, because the blog slogan is "Revisiting the Past, One Blog at a Time", and I felt the image of Godzilla and Mothra looking at the Earth from the Moon, was especially evocative and kind of helped drive that home. So there ya go, a free peak into the creation of this site!

I grew up loving Godzilla, and while I have yet to get around to writing about the classic movies I love so much, trust me, it's going to happen.  I do not clearly remember which Godzilla film I saw first, as I grew up in a (better) era of television, when local stations would often show old monster movies late at night. But the first G-film I do clearly remember, is the first one I ever got on VHS tape. It may well have been the first VHS tape of my childhood that was actually "mine", and not just the family's. That movie was "Godzilla vs. the Sea Monster" (1966), which is still my second favorite Godzilla movie to this day. My first, of course, being likely the second movie I ever got on VHS, "Godzilla vs. Monster Zero" (1965). Regardless, from at least the age of 8 or so, I was a Godzilla fanatic as a child. In fact it sucks that there were several Godzilla/Toho films I didn't get to see as a kid, because they were never on TV or I never saw them on tape, that I wish I could have just because I would have enjoyed them so much more as a child, when everything generally felt more awesome. You know, before we all grow up and die a little inside. But sufficed to say, being a kid obsessed with both Godzilla, and Nintendo, discovering there was a Godzilla NES game was bound to lead to love at first sight.

Straight out of my childhood.

The game in question is "Godzilla: Monster of Monsters" for the NES. It was actually published by Toho, the studio who created Godzilla and produced his films. It was developed by a little known (now defunct) studio known as Compile, mainly known for their classic shoot 'em up games such as Aleste, Gun-Nac, Blazing Lasers, and The Guardian Legend. But with this game, they took a crack at the side-scrolling action game, and it certainly is a unique take on the genre. As an adult, I have heard many negative things said about this game, and to be fair, it's not the greatest game I've ever played. But to also be fair, for what it is it's also pretty solid, and doesn't deserve some of the shit that the internet retro gaming community has heaped upon it. As you can see in the pic above, in the game you travel to different planets, trying to stop the forces of Planet X, and each world map is depicted as a kind of chess board, with hexagonal spaces. In a way, the game plays out, at least on the surface, similar to a turn-based strategy game, as both monsters you control (Godzilla and Mothra) get a turn to move on the board, and then the enemy monsters also get a turn. Though that's about as far as that goes, as there is literally no other real strategy to the board, you simply have to move across it, defeat the enemy monsters, and take out the enemy base on each planet (the space with the satellite dish thingy). 

Yup. That's a slack-jawed space dragon.

Each space on the board that you move to, represents a short side-scrolling level that you must play through as either Godzilla, who can move two spaces per turn, or Mothra, who can move four. Godzilla is stronger, with punches, kicks, a tail whip, and of course his "destroys everything" thermo-nuclear breath. But Mothra is faster, can fly, and attacks with eye beams and "poison wing dust". Basically, it's a lot easier getting through shit as Godzilla because he's a living wrecking machine, but Mothra is able to fly over many of the ground enemies, so it is technically possible to get through some stages faster with her. Once you reach a space on the map next to an enemy monster, or they move next to you, it initiates a more fighting game style one-on-one battle. For each monster you defeat, your power and life bars upgrade a bit. After you defeat the monsters, and take out the enemy base, which consists of just getting to the end of that stage, you have beaten that world, and move on to the next. One of the knocks on this game is that it's too repetitive, and I'll grant that it really is. There is a bit of variety to the stages, with moon levels, weird alien jungle levels, firey volcano levels, strange subspace levels, and of course the robotic enemy base stages. But that's about it, and they all pretty much play out the same, move left to right, destroy enemies, get to end of stage, move on to the next. So in that sense, for that part of the gameplay I can see how some could get turned off by it. But as a kid, I didn't give a single shit. This was GODZILLA, on NINTENDO, and I actually received it as a gift for my (if I remember correctly) 9th birthday, along with several other games such as Loopz and Spy vs. Spy. But Godzilla was the one I cared about, naturally.

Godzilla vs. his greatest foe, King Ghidora.

After apparently traveling throughout the solar system or at least some of their moons, the final destination is Planet X. In the film "Invasion of the Astro Monster" (aka Godzilla vs. Monster Zero), the only Godzilla film to actually feature him going into space (and in my mind the best Godzilla film ever made), Planet X is depicted as a small, barren, rocky planet. But in the game, it's depicted kind of like the Death Star from Star Wars, as every stage on the board is now an "enemy base" stage, complete with non-stop guns and missiles and ships firing at you from above that you must trudge through. It's worth noting, for fellow Godzilla fans out there who would know what the hell I'm talking about, that while the game does feature several generic enemies, such as that goofy space dragon and fiery phoenix bird in that screenshot further up, many enemies from the game are also taken from other Godzilla/Toho films. Some of these include the Moonlight SY-3 ship from "Destroy All Monsters" (1968), the Gotengo ship from "Atragon" (1963), the Super X ship from "Return of Godzilla" (1984), and Planet X flying saucers from "Godzilla vs. Monster Zero". There were also generic missile launchers and electric "Masers", etc., featured in various classic Godzilla films.

On Planet X, as with the previous worlds, you have to face all the monsters you previously faced, plus of course the game's final boss, King Ghidorah, who also naturally happens to be the hardest monster in the game. If you can manage to take his three-headed ass out, and destroy the final enemy base, you have saved the Earth, send the Planet Xians packing out into space exile, and get to enjoy the end credits. One thing that has to be said about this game, is that while the gameplay is "so-so", and the graphics are decent, the one area that really shines, is the music. "Godzilla: Monster of Monsters" features one of the best NES soundtracks I've ever heard in my life, I mean the tunes in this game genuinely rock. Every planet has it's own tune, as does every monster (with the exception of Moguera and Baragon sharing a tune). The ending/end credits theme, is honestly up there with the Super Mario Bros. 2 end credits theme as one of the coolest and most satisfying "I just beat the game" songs I've ever had the pleasure of hearing. And similarly, it's very soft and somber, kind of a nice closer to the game.

If you've never played "Godzilla: Monster of Monsters", while it's not the BEST game in the universe, if you're a Godzilla fan, merely curious, or just want to enjoy some great "chip tunes", I highly suggest checking this game out. It brought me a lot of great memories (and a few frustrating game deaths) from my childhood, and I still to this day consider it a "classic" in it's own right. Cheers!

Look familiar?

Unnecessary Sequels: Mortal Kombat

Back once more with another installment of the shitty film sequel chronicles! Today we're going to look at a film that is near and dear to my heart, along with it's unnecessary sequel, which was the first experience I ever had as a movie-goer where I was crushingly disappointed not just after the film was over, but during the entire thing. For a bit a of background, I may have mentioned previously that growing up, my grandmother was of a firm mind that seeing movies in theater was a "waste of time", and thus I had to miss out on experiencing a lot of awesome movies on the big screen that other kids my age got to. As such, I didn't get to really start seeing movies in the theater (except for a couple from my very early childhood that I barely remember, such as E.T.), until I was actually 13 years old, when we finally moved to a bigger town right before she passed away. 

I can't clearly remember what the first movie I did see was, there were many during that summer of 1995, such as my first exposure to Jackie Chan in "Rumble in the Bronx", which to me at that time was mind-blowing (as I had never seen Jackie and his antics before). I'm going to propose, however, that the first one I probably saw was "Might Morphin Power Rangers: The Movie", as both it and "Batman Forever" were out around the same time in June '95, and it was a toss-up between those two among my two friends and I. My friend Harold (the one who loves M.C. Kids), was the tie breaking vote to go see Power Rangers, to my chagrin, so we did. I wound up enjoying it to some extent, and we eventually also went to see Batman (which I liked at the time, now...not quite as much).

But no, the movie I'm about to talk about came out in August, and while I had certainly wanted to see Batman (being a big fan of the animated series), this movie, was the first movie I actually got to see in theaters that I remember being hyped to see, and to me at least, it totally lived up to the hype. It was my first "wow" experience going to the movies, and it holds a special place in my movie-loving heart to this day.

Film: Mortal Kombat
Year: 1995
Director: Paul Anderson
Unnecessary Sequel: Mortal Kombat: Annihilation (1997)

 The movie in question, as you can see, was "Mortal Kombat", based on the at the time red-hot arcade game. Funnily enough, when Mortal Kombat originally came out in 1992, and for some time after that, I was a Street Fighter obsessee, and naturally among kids (just like with Nintendo vs. Sega) there was a Street Fighter II vs. Mortal Kombat divide, with different factions arguing which game was better. To me, SFII was unquestionably better, and I also initially didn't like the (what I considered at the time, at age 10 or 11) excessive blood and violence of the game. I think it was actually after Mortal Kombat 2 came out in 1993, that I actually came around to liking it more. MKII had a bit of a deeper sense of story than the first game did, and it also had the (attractive to this monster nut) unique setting of "Outworld", and all of that started to turn me around on the subject. I was officially a fan by the time MK3 came out in early 1995, so as I said I was genuinely hyped to see the film. And as I said, it didn't disappoint.

Great cast.

 

Ironically, the film was directed by Paul Anderson, who really should be commended for doing a great job with it, though he would go on to be derided by yours truly in future years for a long string of substanceless crap such as the "Resident Evil" films, "Death Race", etc. I'd like to think that part of the reason this movie turned out so well, is because the creators of the game were deeply involved in its production, and so perhaps they reigned in whatever nonsensical bullshit he might have wanted to do with it. Then again, maybe he just had one great (to me) movie in him, and then gave in to an overwhelming urge to progressively become one of the worst directors in Hollywood? But I digress.


To me, everything about "Mortal Kombat" the movie was pretty much perfect, from  great casting, to great cinematography, to (for the time) fantastic special effects, amazing sets and ambiance, a killer soundtrack, great fighting action, you name it. In fact, the set-builders did such a good job with their "Outworld" set they created out in a California desert, that it actually scared commercial pilots flying over it by night. The casting really couldn't have been much better. Christopher Lambert almost steals the show as Raiden, god of thunder and lightning. Linden Ashby was perfect in the role of cocky martial arts film star Johnny Cage (especially considering he had no prior training, he looked great in his fight scenes). Bridgette Wilson had a strong and evocative turn as conflicted special-forces operative Sonya Blade. Cary Tagawa was both chilling and awesome as villain sorcerer Shang Tsung. And of course the star of the show, Robin Shou was practically born for the role of shaolin warrior Liu Kang.

Mortal enemies, ninja assassin Sub-Zero and undead spectre Scorpion.

As for the film itself, from beginning to end, it just really pops. If you're a Mortal Kombat fan, it has everything you could want. If you're just a fan of martial arts/action films, it still has plenty to keep you entertained. And honestly, even if you're not usually a fan of that kind of movie, it's still a quality flick worth seeing, in my humble opinion. What they managed to do in this film for a (by today's standards) paltry $18 million budget, is really surprising. A lot of care and attention to detail was put into everything. And while certainly, not everything is 100% accurate to the games, with several things added or embellished, none of it detracts from the film or makes it feel "off" at all. In fact some of the addition to detail, such as many facets of Shang Tsung's private island (obviously inspired by the great Bruce Lee epic "Enter the Dragon"), and the created-for-the-film character of martial-artist Art Lean, was exceptionally well done.

Prince Goro, ruler of the Shokan race, and reigning Mortal Kombat Champion.

 

As seen above, they pulled off the boss character from MK1, Goro, with a combination of a live actor in a suit, and animatronics. And as you can see, it came out pretty good, easily as good as that of, say, the TMNT movies or the "Dinosaurs" TV show. It really holds up well, even today, and while CGI might arguably have helped make him look "better", I find that often times practical effects make things more organic and realistic than computer effects. Goro was voiced by legendary voice actor Frank Welker, who also did various other voices in the film, such as that of the creature/warrior Reptile, and a cameo appearance at the end of (SPOILERS) "Outworld" ruler Shao Khan.

All in all, the film, at least in my opinion, is just very well done. Great fight scenes include: Liu Kang vs. Sub-Zero, Johnny Cage vs. Scorpion, and Liu Kang vs. Shang Tsung + souls of vanquished warriors near the end of the film (ALSO SPOILERS). Someone I knew had the soundtrack to the movie, and I listened to it quite a bit, even for a couple of years after the movie had come out. Mortal Kombat was a phenomenon in the 90s, and this movie was/is a perfect preservation of that. I honestly could continue to go on about it at length, but that wouldn't leave time for the bad news. And the bad news is, that unfortunately, this film's sequel, which I was ALSO super-hyped for, wound up being a complete shitter.

"Destroy All Expectations"....it certainly did.

 

Trust me when I tell you there was a LOT of hype surrounding this movie. Not only had the first film been a huge blockbuster success, but Mortal Kombat 3 and even to a lesser extent Mortal Kombat 4 had gone on in the following years to grow the popularity of the franchise. There was major hype surrounding the fact that it was revealed ahead of time that arch-enemies Scorpion and Sub-Zero, would actually fight in this film (in the first they had merely been pawns of Shang Tsung). That alone was enough reason to get fans salivating over the possibilities. But as fate would have it, it was not meant to be. This is one of the very few films I've ever seen, let alone in theaters, that I shit you not, within the first few moments of the film, I already knew it was going to be a crap-fest. 

Literally, in the abrupt opening scenes of the film, what is supposed to be a giant portal from Outworld appears in the sky, as Shao Khan has cheated the gods' tournament system (the winner of ten straight would rule the Earth realm, but Liu Kang won the 10th tournament saving Earth), and his armies are invading. Just in that opening scene, that portal and the effects of the Outworld warriors teleporting to the ground....it all just looked so damn cheesy that I physically groaned. Then Johnny Cage, played by another actor because Linden Ashby either wasn't available or didn't want to be in the picture just to get offed in a short, crappy scene, gets unceremoniously killed. No big, dramatic, touching warriors' death, fitting of a beloved character. Nope. Just a quick neck-break or something of that type.

In fact, the only returning actors from the first movie were Robin Shou, and Talisa Soto who played Princess Kitana, Shao Khan's adopted daughter and rightful heir to Outworld (or Edenia, as it's actually called). The rest of the new cast was, for the most part, fairly forgettable. Actress Sandra Hess was cast as Sonya, with Lynn Williams playing her over-the-top partner Jax. James Remar, honestly a really good actor in most roles, was re-cast as Lord Raiden, and although he tried, it just wasn't the same without Lambert, who made that role. The villains this time around, were Bryan Thompson (Sir Brock from Dragonheart) as Shao Khan, and Musetta Vander as his "bride" Queen Sindel, Kitana's once-deceased mother. They themselves weren't exactly horrible, but the acting and everything else in general in this film, were really just sub-par and very "meh".

This picture honestly sums up all I really need to say.

 

The amazing thing, is that they took over two years to make this film, on a budget nearly twice as much as the first. They had all the time in the world to get it right, and while they had a new director (John Leonetti), that hardly should have mattered. All they had to do was follow the blueprint they already established with the first, and with a bigger budget, they absolutely should have made at least a competent film. But they didn't even accomplish that. The final product honestly resembles something made for TV or direct to video, not a $30 million dollar (which was big for the time) theatrical sequel to a blockbuster hit. Where the first film was, beginning to end, an enjoyable ride through an otherworldly story of mortal men and women fighting to defend Earth, the sequel is, beginning to end, a monotonous and sometimes painful exercise in just about everything you shouldn't do when making a film like this. The effects were somehow far cheaper on a bigger budget, the fight scenes shorter and shittier, even though Robin Shou himself handled the stunt choreography. The much-vaunted fight between Sub-Zero and Scorpion lasted (seemingly) less than a minute total, and wound up actually being a rather throw-away scene in a film chock-full of rather throw-away, pointless, nonsensical scenes.

They threw in several Mortal Kombat 2 and 3 characters, such as mutant assassin Baraka, Kitana's clone "sister" Milena, ninja warriors Rain, Smoke and Ermac (even a "not really" cameo by shadow ninja Noob Saibot), and as seen above, Shokan warrior (and former wife of Prince Goro) Sheeva, and leader of their rival centaur tribe, Motaro. But none of those inclusions, or others, wound up even mattering, because they were almost to a single one pulled off horribly. Kitana's mysterious ally Jade was also in the film, a green ninja woman, but her part was pointless. The cybernetic ninja character Cyrax makes an appearance, but is quickly destroyed. The Native American warrior Nightwolf (played by good actor Litefoot), also makes a very brief cameo, in which they actually have him break the fourth wall and talk about Liu Kang learning to use his "Animality" (a type of finishing move from MK3). The end of the film is a clusterfuck of bad, with the final nail being the writers deciding to tell the audience that Raiden and Shao Khan are actually brothers, and that the fallen Elder God Shinnock is their father. That's about as bad (and just as horribly incorrect) as the "Wolverine" film trying to tell us that Logan and Sabertooth are brothers (which they are not, nor have they ANY blood relation).



 

So the final verdict, is that this is one case where the sequel wasn't fundamentally "unnecessary", in fact if done right it would have been greatly warranted. The first film is a great stand-alone picture, but given the source material there was certainly room to do a sequel covering Shao Khan's invasion of Earth. BUT, while not unnecessary, it is a (sadly) perfect case of a sequel that obviously still SHOULDN'T have been made, because it wound up being, in this man's opinion, one of the worst films ever made. And yes, I'm fully aware that that is really saying something.

So if you've never seen it, do yourself a solid and watch the original Mortal Kombat film some night. But unless you enjoy watching painfully bad films, I'd highly advise completely ignoring the sequel. Cheers!